A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales. The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very small. The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale.. Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossible. The little girl said, ‘When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah’. The teacher asked, ‘What if Jonah went to hell?’ The little girl replied, ‘Then you ask him’.
A Kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of children while they were drawing. She would occasionally walk around to see each child’s work. As she got to one little girl who was working diligently, she asked what the drawing was. The girl replied, ‘I’m drawing God.’ The teacher paused and said, ‘But no one knows what God looks like.’ Without missing a beat, or looking up from her drawing, the girl replied, ‘They will in a minute.
A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five and six year old. After explaining the commandment to ‘honour’ thy Father and thy Mother, she asked, ‘Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?’ Without missing a beat one little boy (the oldest of a family) answered, ‘Thou shall not kill.’
One day a little girl was sitting and watching her mother do the dishes at the kitchen sink. She suddenly noticed that her mother had several strands of white hair sticking out in contrast on her brunette head. She looked at her mother and inquisitively asked, ‘Why are some of your hairs white, Mum?’ Her mother replied, ‘Well, every time that you do something wrong and make me cry or unhappy, one of my hairs turns white.’ The little girl thought about this revelation for a while and then said, ‘Mummy, how come ALL of grandma’s hairs are white?’ ———-
The children had all been photographed, and the teacher was trying to persuade them each to buy a copy of the group picture. ‘Just think how nice it will be to look at it when you are all grown up and say, ‘There’s Jennifer, she’s a lawyer,’ or ‘That’s Michael, He’s a doctor.’ A small voice at the back of the room rang out, ‘And there’s the teacher, she’s dead.’
A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood. Trying to make the matter clearer, she said, ‘Now, class, if I stood on my head, the blood, as you know, would run into it, and I would turn red in the face.’ ‘Yes,’ the class said. ‘Then why is it that while I am standing upright in the ordinary position the blood doesn’t run into my feet?’ A little fellow shouted, ‘Cause your feet ain’t empty.’ ———-
The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples. The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray: ‘Take only ONE. God is watching.’ Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies. A child had written a note, ‘Take all you want. God is watching the apples.’
A teacher was debating with her young students about it being impossible for Moses to preform the miracle of parting the Red Sea. This all because, as the teacher says, the Red Sea only gets to be about 6-12 inches deep when the tides are down at that time of year. A child then replies: “then it was a miracle that Pharoh and his whole army drowned in 6-12 inches of water!”
1. My hands are small; please do not expect perfection whenever I make a bed, draw a picture, or throw a ball. My legs are short; slow down so that I can keep up with you.
2. My eyes have not seen the world as yours have; let me explore it safely; do not restrict me unnecessarily.
3. Housework will always be there; I am little only for a short time. Take time to explain things to me about this wonderful world, and do so willingly.
4. My feelings are tender; do not nag me all day long (you would not want to be nagged for your inquisitiveness). Treat me as you would like to be treated.
5. I am a special gift from God; treasure me as God intended you to do - holding me accountable for my actions, giving me guidelines to live by, and discipline me in a loving manner.
6. I need your encouragement (but not your empty praise) to grow. Go easy on the criticism; remember you can criticize the things I do without criticizing me.
7. Give me the freedom to make decisions concerning myself. Permit me to fail, so that I can learn from my mistakes. Then someday I will be prepared to make the decisions life will require of me.
8. Do not do things for me; that makes me feel that my efforts did not measure up to your expectations. I know its hard, but don’t compare me with my brother or sister.
9. Do not be afraid to leave for a weekend together. Kids need vacations from parents, and parents need vacations from kids. Besides, it’s a great way to show us kids that your marriage is something special.
10. Take me to Sunday school and church regularly, setting a good example for me to follow. I enjoy learning more about God.